Writer Sanctum

Writer's Haven => Quill and Feather Pub [Public] => Topic started by: JRTomlin on October 23, 2019, 11:47:19 AM

Title: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: JRTomlin on October 23, 2019, 11:47:19 AM
I discovered that I had my characters shake their heads SIXTY-FIVE TIMES in this novel. Their brains must have been rattling like -- whatever it is that rattles. 🤦

I thought I had broken myself of that kind of nonsense. So no I am going through and looking at each one. A few will remain because people do sometimes shake their heads. But most will come out and yikes. 😲
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: TimothyEllis on October 23, 2019, 12:12:50 PM
Sometimes?

Actually spend a day recording when you shake your head or nod.

I do both a lot, but its an unconscious thing. But I am more aware of it now I write it.
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: Maggie Ann on October 23, 2019, 12:46:16 PM
Sometimes?

Actually spend a day recording when you shake your head or nod.

I do both a lot, but its an unconscious thing. But I am more aware of it now I write it.

I do that just sitting in front of the screen.
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: LilyBLily on October 23, 2019, 01:57:37 PM
Nodding must go. Each character gets one nod per book. I hate descriptions. 
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: JRTomlin on October 23, 2019, 02:14:02 PM
I love descriptions just not of people nodding and shrugging page after page.  :doh:

I kept nods when they were actually agreeing to something. When it was a beat for some other purpose the nods are gone, either deleted or replaces with something less repetitive.
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: TimothyEllis on October 23, 2019, 02:19:07 PM
I love descriptions just not of people nodding and shrugging page after page.  :doh:

I kept nods when they were actually agreeing to something. When it was a beat for some other purpose the nods are gone, either deleted or replaces with something less repetitive.

I need to use scratching their chin more.
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: VanessaC on October 23, 2019, 06:12:20 PM
Yep, I've been guilty of this too. Nodding, shaking heads, looking, eyebrows lifting, and all the other basic moves.

I have other verbal tics in my writing that really annoy me when I notice them - for example, in the last book I had a lot of instances of "For a moment ..." Took nearly all of them out, and I'm banning that phrase from my current draft!
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: Maggie Ann on October 23, 2019, 11:19:28 PM
Yep, I've been guilty of this too. Nodding, shaking heads, looking, eyebrows lifting, and all the other basic moves.

I have other verbal tics in my writing that really annoy me when I notice them - for example, in the last book I had a lot of instances of "For a moment ..." Took nearly all of them out, and I'm banning that phrase from my current draft!

When I ask my grandson to do something, he always replies, "In a bit." Unfortunately, it's crept into my writing. I finally complained enough that he changed his response to, "At some point." I hope that doesn't take over from in a bit."
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: JackT on October 24, 2019, 01:49:32 AM
If it's any consolation, Agatha Christie uses "shook his/her head" in And Then There Were None twenty-three times so you're in good company!

Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: DrewMcGunn on October 24, 2019, 10:21:02 AM
I discovered that I had my characters shake their heads SIXTY-FIVE TIMES in this novel. Their brains must have been rattling like -- whatever it is that rattles. 🤦

I thought I had broken myself of that kind of nonsense. So no I am going through and looking at each one. A few will remain because people do sometimes shake their heads. But most will come out and yikes. 😲

I feel your pain. When I read my first couple of books and see how often my characters nod or shake their heads, I grimace and shake my head.

Now my characters nod and dip their heads, grimace, and steeple their fingers, scratch their chins, or twirl their mustaches (ok, not really the last one...that's way to Snidely Whiplash-ish)
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: JRTomlin on October 24, 2019, 02:01:40 PM
I throw in shoved his hands through his hair. Grip his hair and pull. Cross his arms, run his hands over his face and a couple of others I can't think of at the moment. And then I actually cut unneeded beats that I put there just cuz.  :doh:
Title: Re: My characters rattled their brains
Post by: Tom Wood on October 25, 2019, 08:28:27 AM
Ah, the joys of screenwriting. All that nodding, shaking, scratching, and other non-verbal communication is entirely the purview of the director. Wannabe screenwriters, however, positively litter their screenplays with the stuff.

AKA: wrylies
(He said, wryly)