Writer Sanctum
Writer's Haven => Quill and Feather Pub [Public] => Topic started by: Rhett Gervais on October 13, 2018, 05:30:20 AM
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Rant on: Why is it family members don't understand that just because I'm in the house that I am available! If the door is closed, I'm working and everytime you come in you break my rhythm!
Rant off:
Does anyone else suffer from this problem. I took the day off from work so I could write, not so I could we could chit chat!...
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I hear you. I can never write when my kids are home, so I don't even bother. I know I'm guilty of bugging my husband when he's working, so I try not to let it bother me when he does the same, but we both respect that a closed door means no bothering the other person.
Guess you just have to sit down and say, hey, when the door is closed, I don't want to be disturbed and unless the house is on fire, leave me a note. It might be nice to receive a post it note.
Or not.
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I live in a building of lofts and the other residents know I'm typically home and writing. Knocks on the door for random things used to happen until I got a couple of signs to hang on my door (from an Etsy shop:https://www.etsy.com/shop/LittleBookishLtd?ref=l2-shopheader-name (https://www.etsy.com/shop/LittleBookishLtd?ref=l2-shopheader-name))
The first sign read:
Please Go Away
I'm Writing
I upped the stakes for my second sign and it reads:
Knock
And I'll Kill You In My Next Book
(I'd attach photos but I can never figure it out)
Works a charm.
:hehe
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I upped the stakes for my second sign and it reads:
Knock
And I'll Kill You In My Next Book
(I'd attach photos but I can never figure it out)
Works a charm.
:hehe
:roll:
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My husband used to umpire so I have a picture of him and the words: You're OUT!!! taped to my office door :)
I trained my kids to interrupt if they were bleeding but it was hard when they were running in and out of the house with their friends.
You need a sign like KFaitor!!!
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Right there with you! I decided to start working at home instead of going to the coffee shop (and spending money) every day. And MAN. Dogs want attention, husband wants attention...Go away all of you!
Husband has opened the door (which was shut for a reason) and gotten "Go away, I'm on a timer here." For some reason, that made him cranky grint
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Right there with you! I decided to start working at home instead of going to the coffee shop (and spending money) every day. And MAN. Dogs want attention, husband wants attention...Go away all of you!
Husband has opened the door (which was shut for a reason) and gotten "Go away, I'm on a timer here." For some reason, that made him cranky grint
Ya I got the cranky today. I told her I took the day off to clean up my manuscript before it went to the editor! I got the "your being selfish vibe" because I didn't want to talk about her work!
Crazyness
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Oh my goodness, yes. I have this issue all the time. My "office" doubles as a gaming room and my husband and I sit next to each other while I write, so I'm at a severe disadvantage. Sometimes he says just one thing, and it breaks my rhythm entirely. I then have to go back and reread most of the chapter I'm in to get back into it, and if he interrupts me again, I have to repeat. I feel so bad telling him to please stop bothering me since sometimes I can write from morning to bedtime and I know he misses me, but when I'm in the mood for writing I can't just shrug it off. :confused:
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Right there with you! I decided to start working at home instead of going to the coffee shop (and spending money) every day. And MAN. Dogs want attention, husband wants attention...Go away all of you!
Husband has opened the door (which was shut for a reason) and gotten "Go away, I'm on a timer here." For some reason, that made him cranky grint
Ya I got the cranky today. I told her I took the day off to clean up my manuscript before it went to the editor! I got the "your being selfish vibe" because I didn't want to talk about her work!
Crazyness
My neighbor absolutely despises me because I refuse to interrupt my work for her. Everyone from the police to her father to the neighborhood watch captain have explained to her that I do work, and just like she doesn't go to everyone else's office and demand they stop work to pay attention to her, she also can't interrupt my work to demand my attention.
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Sometimes I'm glad I live alone. (And sometimes, like in the dead of winter when snowed in and I don't see anyone for days...not so much.)
Pets can learn that work is work. At least mine does; maybe I'm just lucky. She's learned to either go do her own thing or just hang out nearby when I'm typing. :catrun
I think humans might be a little more challenging sometimes. I admire you all for your patience navigating this issue! Your loved ones are lucky. :-) I'm not sure how patient I'd be. I even get annoyed if my phone rings while I'm writing.
...Aaaaand I just realized I should be muting my phone when I sit down to write. :n2Str17:
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I feel for those of you who have humans sharing your spaces - when I was working in an office I used to get really fed up of the constant interruptions. Everyone only wanted five minutes, but five minutes was never actually five minutes and there was a series of people wanting five minutes. And every interruption broke my chain of concentration / thought, meaning everything took so much longer than it should have.
Oh, I'm so glad I am now an anti-social so-and-so working from home.
My four-legged house mates are a bit more understanding about work time and play time, except when they are hungry.
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You've gotta train people. Like a football coach.
Less love, less explaining, and less waffling, and more authority.
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My neighbor absolutely despises me because I refuse to interrupt my work for her. Everyone from the police to her father to the neighborhood watch captain have explained to her that I do work, and just like she doesn't go to everyone else's office and demand they stop work to pay attention to her, she also can't interrupt my work to demand my attention.
Wait, wait wait. POLICE? Please, this is a story I need to hear!
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Rant on: Why is it family members don't understand that just because I'm in the house that I am available! If the door is closed, I'm working and everytime you come in you break my rhythm!
Rant off:
Does anyone else suffer from this problem. I took the day off from work so I could write, not so I could we could chit chat!...
Yup, I hear ya. It's the eternal struggle of being self-employed and working at home; most folks think they can come in anytime and be like:
(https://s3.amazonaws.com/marketing-blog.contactually.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/desk-swipe.gif)
and then I feel like
(https://media.giphy.com/media/olbigRnywa9Ww/giphy.gif)
but because I still sometimes do value real human relationships I have to be nice & not flip my lid on being interrupted for the trillionth time, so I keep it to myself and am like
(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/02/9c/57/029c57e21a1378b1ca687f7d4f5dc0d1.gif)
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I used to write while the kids were at school. Outside of that, they had my attention. Used to finish a new novel every 12-18 months.
Now they're grown up, but I still share a house with my eldest. We both work at our computers all day, and only chat when we're in the kitchen cooking or making coffee.
And these days I'm writing a book a month ;-)
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Cats are the worst, because they don't understand "no" or even the concept of work, and I have one that likes his 5pm cuddle no matter what I'm doing, and usually comes to sit on top of the keyboard for it.
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The answer is a Super Soaker.
The first couple interruptions, it's filled with water.
If they still refuse to learn, you move on to red food coloring.
And if they continue to interrupt, you upgrade to garlic juice or rotten eggs.
Eventually, they'll learn or move out.
Either way, you win.
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Oh my goodness, yes. I have this issue all the time. My "office" doubles as a gaming room and my husband and I sit next to each other while I write, so I'm at a severe disadvantage. Sometimes he says just one thing, and it breaks my rhythm entirely. I then have to go back and reread most of the chapter I'm in to get back into it, and if he interrupts me again, I have to repeat. I feel so bad telling him to please stop bothering me since sometimes I can write from morning to bedtime and I know he misses me, but when I'm in the mood for writing I can't just shrug it off. :confused:
I have the same problem with mine and I do feel bad for saying something but it's hard describing to a non writer what it feels like to have an entire day's worth of idea ripped from you the instant they say your name. Our fingers simply can't keep up.
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I live in a building of lofts and the other residents know I'm typically home and writing. Knocks on the door for random things used to happen until I got a couple of signs to hang on my door (from an Etsy shop:https://www.etsy.com/shop/LittleBookishLtd?ref=l2-shopheader-name (https://www.etsy.com/shop/LittleBookishLtd?ref=l2-shopheader-name))
The first sign read:
Please Go Away
I'm Writing
I upped the stakes for my second sign and it reads:
Knock
And I'll Kill You In My Next Book
(I'd attach photos but I can never figure it out)
Works a charm.
:hehe
Oh my! My shopping cart overfloweth...
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My neighbor absolutely despises me because I refuse to interrupt my work for her. Everyone from the police to her father to the neighborhood watch captain have explained to her that I do work, and just like she doesn't go to everyone else's office and demand they stop work to pay attention to her, she also can't interrupt my work to demand my attention.
Wait, wait wait. POLICE? Please, this is a story I need to hear!
Oh my god, it was crazy. She wanted to talk to me about something -- some weird bit of interpersonal drama that had only the absolute faintest connection to me (I used to live in a city wherein someone else involved once drove through) -- and when I declined, she insisted that I talk to her and get involved. She wanted me to call some dude to tell him what I thought about some encounter she had -- I've known her for like three days at that point, she was basically a stranger, so I refused. When she declined to leave, I called the police, and she insisted to the police that I didn't really have work to do. I told her point-blank that I would not ever be involved in her affairs. She explained to the police how I was bullsh*tting and I could listen to her thing (which again she'd been shouting about outside my place for like an hour at that point, so I'd basically heard it all already). The cops told her I was not obligated to give her any portion of my time. I gave her my email address, and she has been gamely sending stuff directly to my spam folder, which is apparently good enough for her. I've never responded to any of her emails.
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I live in a building of lofts and the other residents know I'm typically home and writing. Knocks on the door for random things used to happen until I got a couple of signs to hang on my door (from an Etsy shop:https://www.etsy.com/shop/LittleBookishLtd?ref=l2-shopheader-name (https://www.etsy.com/shop/LittleBookishLtd?ref=l2-shopheader-name))
The first sign read:
Please Go Away
I'm Writing
I upped the stakes for my second sign and it reads:
Knock
And I'll Kill You In My Next Book
(I'd attach photos but I can never figure it out)
Works a charm.
:hehe
Love those!
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I took over the garage, built a fully functioning office, and put a sign on the outside of the door that reads, "If you can read this, back the f*** off. I'm working. Go away. This means you." Nobody knocks on the door, they just barge in. Then I put a lock on the door. Now my wife calls my cell to ask me to stop and switch the laundry so she can get some extra time on the treadmill. :HB
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I took over the garage, built a fully functioning office, and put a sign on the outside of the door that reads, "If you can read this, back the f*** off. I'm working. Go away. This means you." Nobody knocks on the door, they just barge in. Then I put a lock on the door. Now my wife calls my cell to ask me to stop and switch the laundry so she can get some extra time on the treadmill. :HB
I have an office. Fully decked out in the basement. But no lock on it. I think im gonna put one...good idea!
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Rant on: Why is it family members don't understand that just because I'm in the house that I am available! If the door is closed, I'm working and everytime you come in you break my rhythm!
Rant off:
Does anyone else suffer from this problem. I took the day off from work so I could write, not so I could we could chit chat!...
I feel you, brother. It took a good 2-3 years before my family got this. Now, they try to get to me BEFORE the door closes if they need my attention. When it closes, they stay clear, and wait until it reopens later in the day.
I think the problem is that most people just don't understand how writing works, and it's hard to explain it to them because, frankly, WE don't really understand it lol. It just happens. For me, anyway. I'm a pantser. Sometimes I will sit in my room for hours playing games on my cellphone if nothing comes to me. Other times, I'll bang out a chapter in an hour.
But now, everyone respects the closed door. :D
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Cats are the worst, because they don't understand "no" or even the concept of work, and I have one that likes his 5pm cuddle no matter what I'm doing, and usually comes to sit on top of the keyboard for it.
:catrun YES! Our calico is leash trained, so every morning after she and the Siamese cry for breakfast, she then also cries at the door to be let out. Don't get me wrong, sometimes she doesn't like the idea of being leashed and runs away when you try to put it on her, but about half the time she sits at the door meowing and howling until someone puts on her harness, walks her, then brings her back inside when she is good and ready. Husband is currently in the process of making a run for her in our yard, which is fenced, so she will be by the window. We tried putting her out there alone once and she got irked because she wanted to be walked around. :HB
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Join her and the girls for a mani-pedi and talk guy stuff the whole time. Maybe play the game on your phone real loud while at the salon. There's a visual.
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I wrote my first three novels with a 2-year-old on my lap. Thank goodness he is older now and will sit in front of Netflix (yes, I am that mom) which I've become a pro at tuning out.
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I feel the same way about reading in public. If I'm a book, a newspaper, whatever, clearly I don't want to be bothered, yet people still think I want to have a conversation with them. But no matter where you work, whether it's an office/factory/restaurant, you're never going to be allowed to concentrate on your work 100% of the time. There will always be occasional interruptions from somewhere.
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- Go away, I am writing!
- Meow?
- No, not there. Nope!
- Meow!
- I said I am wri-AARRGGH my hand!
- Meow.
:catrun
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I try to put myself into solitary confinement when I'm home and writing, but wherever I end up landing becomes the default "Everyone come over and be RIGHT HERE" place for the rest of them...including the two cats. You'd think I wouldn't mind the cats, but they fight as much as my teenagers do so...yeah.
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I had a long talk with friends and family and now I use this :
(https://i.imgur.com/ApmBNan.jpg)
And they know I am serious! When it's up I don't want anything to do with anyone...
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I had a long talk with friends and family and now I use this :
(https://i.imgur.com/ApmBNan.jpg)
And they know I am serious! When it's up I don't want anything to do with anyone...
OMG perfect!
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Omg this is SO happening to me right now. I'm in the last 2 chapters of a novel and my husband has been interrupting me for days. It's so bad I scream inside every time he opens that damn door. Truly, he is a wonderful man who misses me, but this is my work and he doesn't get--no matter how many times I tell him--that when he interrupts me even for the silliest, smallest thing it throws me off for like half an hour. And makes me angry. He was doing good for a while there but lately, holy sh*t I am ranting but it's so, so stressful when we agree on the time in advance and he interrupts me anyway. I need a lock on my door.
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Omg this is SO happening to me right now. I'm in the last 2 chapters of a novel and my husband has been interrupting me for days. It's so bad I scream inside every time he opens that damn door. Truly, he is a wonderful man who misses me, but this is my work and he doesn't get--no matter how many times I tell him--that when he interrupts me even for the silliest, smallest thing it throws me off for like half an hour. And makes me angry. He was doing good for a while there but lately, holy sh*t I am ranting but it's so, so stressful when we agree on the time in advance and he interrupts me anyway. I need a lock on my door.
Run Away!! :banana-riding-llama-smiley-em :help :pdt (I was going to give you a hug but Tim took them away apparently!! LOL)
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Omg this is SO happening to me right now. I'm in the last 2 chapters of a novel and my husband has been interrupting me for days. It's so bad I scream inside every time he opens that damn door. Truly, he is a wonderful man who misses me, but this is my work and he doesn't get--no matter how many times I tell him--that when he interrupts me even for the silliest, smallest thing it throws me off for like half an hour. And makes me angry. He was doing good for a while there but lately, holy sh*t I am ranting but it's so, so stressful when we agree on the time in advance and he interrupts me anyway. I need a lock on my door.
I'm feeling rage on your behalf - this used to happen to me all the time in a business context. Numerous studies show that when we're interrupted, it can take up to half an hour to get back to the concentration and focus we had before the interruption. I just used to seethe internally, and work later to make up the time. Not healthy!! Hopefully you'll find a more mature way of dealing with it than I did. Grin
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Ask him to write a 500-word essay while answering three of your questions at the same time...
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I've been getting up early and also writing on my days off that fall with his days on. It seems to be working this week. :dizzy
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Ask him to write a 500-word essay while answering three of your questions at the same time...
:icon_lol2: I've made my kids do this for all sorts of infarctions. It works!
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I've been getting up early and also writing on my days off that fall with his days on. It seems to be working this week. :dizzy
Wincing.. if you keep working around him like that he will never learn.
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I've been getting up early and also writing on my days off that fall with his days on. It seems to be working this week. :dizzy
Wincing.. if you keep working around him like that he will never learn.
My family comes first though. Frustrated as I am, we'll work through it like everything else. I did, however, finally finish my book today! *punches the air*
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My family comes first though. Frustrated as I am, we'll work through it like everything else. I did, however, finally finish my book today! *punches the air*
Congratulations, Rose. :cheers
(I was going to give you a hug but Tim took them away apparently!! LOL)
You have to click "more" to get to some of the emoticons. :hug: :grouphug:
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I've been getting up early and also writing on my days off that fall with his days on. It seems to be working this week. :dizzy
Wincing.. if you keep working around him like that he will never learn.
My family comes first though. Frustrated as I am, we'll work through it like everything else. I did, however, finally finish my book today! *punches the air*
More than fair! :) GRATZ!! I love that feeling!!
Jeff, TY!@! :yourock:
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Jeff, TY!@! :yourock:
You're welcome. :cheers
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I've been getting up early and also writing on my days off that fall with his days on. It seems to be working this week. :dizzy
Wincing.. if you keep working around him like that he will never learn.
My family comes first though. Frustrated as I am, we'll work through it like everything else. I did, however, finally finish my book today! *punches the air*
Congrats! Best feeling ever
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Rant on: Why is it family members don't understand that just because I'm in the house that I am available! If the door is closed, I'm working and everytime you come in you break my rhythm!
Rant off:
Does anyone else suffer from this problem. I took the day off from work so I could write, not so I could we could chit chat!...
At least you have a door. I write at the kitchen table. :lalala :band: What's a rhythm?
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I’m with you Keith. Unfortunately my little one is home with a cold so I’ve not had the chance to write for a few days now and I’m only one chapter away from finishing a first draft :writethink:
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Luckily I live alone these days but when I had a house full (four adults, two teens, a five year old kid, two dogs, and one cat PLUS the PC was in the living room) I learned the fine art of tuning out everyone and everything. A bomb could have gone off without me noticing. I realize that going on autopilot is hard, esp for parents, but with practice everything is doable.
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Luckily I live alone these days but when I had a house full (four adults, two teens, a five year old kid, two dogs, and one cat PLUS the PC was in the living room) I learned the fine art of tuning out everyone and everything. A bomb could have gone off without me noticing. I realize that going on autopilot is hard, esp for parents, but with practice everything is doable.
That’s some superhuman powers of concentration!
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Recently I was bearing down on a deadline for a ghostwriting project. Even though I had told my wife that I needed to get things done to meet the deadline, she came and sat down several times those last few days to have a conversation while I was at the computer working. Finally, I just looked at her and she was like "Do you want me to leave you alone?" I very politely said "yes." :icon_rofl:
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I told the same thing to my wife. She left and came back with a receipt for a $200 shopping trip.
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I told the same thing to my wife. She left and came back with a receipt for a $200 shopping trip.
:icon_rofl:
ETA: Wouldn't that make her shopping trip tax deductible?
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At least we are in good company.. grint Where do you think he got this scene from? :hehe (ETA: Graphic language, so watch out for your little ones walking through!)
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I told the same thing to my wife. She left and came back with a receipt for a $200 shopping trip.
:icon_rofl:
ETA: Wouldn't that make her shopping trip tax deductible?
How do I write off Victoria's Secret - research, or maybe uniform expense, lol :icon_rofl:
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I told the same thing to my wife. She left and came back with a receipt for a $200 shopping trip.
:icon_rofl:
ETA: Wouldn't that make her shopping trip tax deductible?
How do I write off Victoria's Secret - research, or maybe uniform expense, lol :icon_rofl:
Adult Daycare? :hehe
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At least we are in good company.. grint Where do you think he got this scene from? :hehe (ETA: Graphic language, so watch out for your little ones walking through!)
Damn. I gotta watch the shining now!